The first month of the new school year is officially behind us. The backpacks are broken in, the lunchboxes have a few mystery crumbs, and the morning routine is… well, let’s just say it is what it is and it’s mostly running on autopilot.
However if you are anything like most parents, you might also be carrying something else: GUILT, yes undeserved guilt at that.
Guilt that you did not get the perfect first-day photo.
Guilt that you have already missed a PTA meeting.
Guilt that your child’s lunch was not Pinterest-worthy or as healthy as it could have been.
Guilt that you are not doing “enough.”
Well, it’s time to set that down and give yourself GRACE!
Why Grace Matters More Than Guilt
Parenting is not a performance. Let me say that again, parenting is not a performance. Let that sink in. Parenting is a relationship. And relationships thrive on connection, not perfection. When we lead with guilt, we focus on what we think we are doing wrong. When we lead with grace, we focus on what truly matters: showing up, loving our kids, and doing our best with the time, energy, and resources we have.
Grace says:
- “I am learning as I go.”
- “I can not and will not do it all, and that is okay.”
- “My worth as a parent is not measured by how many themed snacks I make.”
- “My life is not measured by the number of breaths I take but by the moments that take my breath away.”
- “Your child(ren) need your love , not your perfection.”
- “You can reset and try again.”
- “You give yourself grace when things do not go as planned.”
Signs You Are Doing Better Than You Think
- Your child knows they are loved.
- You have created moments of laughter, even in the chaos.
- You have made sure they have what they need to learn and grow.
- You have modeled resilience by showing that mistakes are part of life.
- You set guidelines and limits for child(ren)
- You show a genuine interest in their school life.
- You spend extra time with them as individuals and a group.
Practical Ways to Give Yourself Grace
- Absolutely reframe from the “shoulds and coulds.” Instead of “I should have packed a healthier lunch,” try “I am glad my child has food they will actually eat.”
- Celebrate your small wins. Did you get everyone out the door on time this morning? That is a win and some mornings a major win!
- Let go of comparison. Your family’s rhythm does not have to match anyone else’s. Not the Smith Family or the Jones Family or the Stein Family.
- Build in breathers. Even five minutes of silence can reset your mindset.
- Remember the long game and the end game. Your child will not remember every detail of this month however they will remember how you made them feel for a lifetime.
The start of the school year is a marathon, not a sprint. There will be mornings that run smoothly and mornings that feel like a comedy series or even a @%$# show. However there will be days you feel like you nailed it and are on top of the world and days you feel like the world is on top of you. Trust and believe through it all, choose grace over guilt. Your kids do not need a perfect parent, they need an imperfectly perfect parent, they need you. Remember GRACE over guilt.
Onward and upward,
Kimberly~
